I had a psychological itch not too long ago. You probably know it…that nagging feeling something is about to happen. The satisfying scratch, it turns out, has been venturing into the world of writing. I spend most of my days listening to, and processing through, the many ways people feel, think, and choose. Why not share the fruits of this labor in a non-therapeutic platform?  It feels like a logical next step. So, here we go . . .

The idea behind Feel. Think. Choose. In That Order. is to help you better understand the driving force(s) behind your unwritten “rules for life.” Using these steps, you can confirm you’ve accurately entered your desired destination into your emotional GPS, so to speak, before you ever pull out of the cognitive driveway. 

This feel, think, choose process isn’t anything groundbreaking, by the way. Let’s be clear about that. It borrows generously from the well-established principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – but it isn’t therapy. Instead, it’s a simple series of steps to help you get more of what you actually want out of life, and less of what you don’t. Read on for a sneak peek at what’s covered in the book:

Feel: It’s time to tune into what really moves you. You know, the stuff that gets your blood pumping. It’s a pretty solid bet we’ve all acted impulsively at one point or another. Our emotions can seem overwhelming. Overwhelming emotions can leave us feeling powerless. Identifying whatwe are experiencing, when we’re experiencing it, and howit impacts our decision-making is a fundamental first step. 

Think: You’re constantly taking in new information, making judgments, categorizing data, etc. If you don’t stop to check-in with your decision-making system, you can get reallystuck. The lens through which you view the world restricts or expands your ability to generate choices. Having more choices is almost always better than having fewer! Granting yourself permission to be flexible, re-prioritize, change your mind, and fact-check (both yourself and others!) can change everything.

Choose. Once you’re aware of what you’re feeling and how you think about it, you’re ready to make a choice. By the time you reach this step, the decisions you make will be grounded in a robust decision-making framework. Don’t sweat it, you’ll be uncovering and/or creating it all along the way. You’re now well-positioned to decide what you’ll do next. You can make the decision with a (renewed) sense of empowerment. To be clear, these changes won’t happen overnight. It takes practice and patience to turn feelings and thoughts into value-aligned decisions. When you feel, think, and choose (in that order!), you engage with the world as your most authentic you.

Don’t get me wrong, there is no one-size-fits-all path to wellness. Wellness isn’t really a singular place in time or circumstance, when you get right down to it. Wellness is more about making the healthiest choice for you and doing so as often as you can. Ready to start living your life on your terms? Bookmark this page and check back frequently. You’ll have early access to the completed work!